Wednesday, August 5, 2009

I'm Joining the Vegetable Rights Militant Movement



Man, animal rights? Like seriously what is that? There's no animal Constitution. And why should they have rights but not plants. Plants are just as alive as animals are, right chief? Really plants deserve more credit than animals. I mean, a plant will just stand there. You try to kill a plant? You try to uproot it from its home? A plant just fuckin eats that shit boss. Plant don't give a fuck. Just looks at you. Says YOU WON'T. Fuck is up, a animal will be all running away and shit. Fuck is that? Sack up brah we gon find you. We live everywhere, fuck we invented helicopters and some of us chase you around the woods from out a helicopter (it always comes back to Say-Say Pay-Pay). Shit. And if we don't get you, we just gon get your wife or something. Your cousin. Fuck, maybe your kids. Whereas a plant, at least this bro's a little more realistic, like, "Yeah, you got me, I'm not going nowhere." And you know what's really fucked up, and which is why people are totally wrong about this animal rights, veganism, shit is that we are way worse to plants. Like we will actually peel the skin off a live plant and then devour it. We will take unborn plants, "fruits" or I prefer "plant fetuses" and rip them off the plant and then eat em in front of the parents. Now there's some messed up shit we do in the animal world, but nothing so fucked up as eating their fetuses. Nothing. That's why I'm saying, like we need to get away from this feeling bad for animals. If you are a vegetarian think of what you are doing to the plant kingdom. That's why I'm strictly carnivore, I don't ever eat my vegetables, cause they're not mine. I have compassion. I am going to join the Vegetable Rights Militant Movement. (<3>




AND WHAT THE FUCK IS FREEGAN? I heard that I'm like damn white people really got too bored. Had to create something new. What they only eat and wear post-consumer recycled cardboard? Someone tell me what a freegan is.

I will say one more thing. Yo a venus flytrap. Ain't that some shit. That's a carnivorous plant. Respeck dat.

1 comment:

  1. YO ALL THE KIDS THAT SHOP AT THE OLIVE STORES ARE USUALLY FREEGAN!! upper middle class suburban white kids that have nothing to prove, but set out to do it anyway.

    speaking of which, we gotta go begging before i leave for school. i looked rill cracked out today.

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